New Parents and the Oregon Trail...

      When you have a baby, one of the first hard realizations you'll have to deal with is that you aren't going to be taking any spontaneous jaunts across country (or to the corner store) any time soon. In fact you learn this on the day you leave the hospital with your little bundle of joy. For those who haven't had a kid yet I can tell you that this transition isn't a gentle one. You don't remember coming into the hospital room with bags and bags of stuff, yet when you leave suddenly you feel much like a pack mule carrying supplies for some early pioneer on the Oregon Trail. After a long waddle you find yourself at the car and open the trunk. A gasp escapes your lips at the realization that you aren't going on some long trip, you aren't moving to a new town, you're only trying to get your family home and yet your trunk (and in our case the front seat) is suddenly full of crap. Instinctively I look over all of the various sacks and luggage in the trunk and do a quick evaluation in a futile attempt to figure out what I can leave behind ultimately trying to lighten my load and increase efficiency, and yet EVERYTHING seems essential... How can that be? When we rushed here from home we knew we would be here for a few days and we didn't even OPEN the trunk let alone pack it full of stuff... and yet we seemed to get along just fine... How could it be that something as small as a baby could require so much baggage?
         My wife and I used to be able to leave for a few days without any consideration to careful planning. We'd throw whatever clean clothes we had in a small bag and head off into the sunset like Smokey and the Bandit. Earlier this week my wife was required to go on a business trip to Jersey City for a two night stay. Since she is nursing, Olivia and I got to tag along with her. To put it simply, we started packing the NIGHT BEFORE for this ONE HOUR TRIP. You would have thought we were making a run at the summit of Mt. Everest for gods sake. . .  Here's a quick rundown...

Stroller
Pack and Play
Diaper Bag (with 400 diapers)
Pack of 1000 Wipes
Bottles
Nipples
Emergency formula
Breast pump
Breast pump bottles
Breast pump valves
Breast pump tubing
Breast milk baggies for storage of said breast milk
Ice pack for keeping breast milk cold until consumption
Bottle brush
300 baby outfits
200 burp cloths
Baby
Oxygen Tank
Tent
Emergency Rations
Rope
Ice Axe
Tummy time mat
Compass
Dish soap
Tub
Towels
Washcloths
Sherpa Guide (VIVA NEPAL!!)
...... (sigh)
Oh yeah, MOM AND DADS SUITCASES (1 Each)

     I know that I've forgotten a bunch of things that were on our original list but I'm sure you get the idea. I guess what I'm getting at here friends is that before you have a kid, buy a goddamn SUV and make things easy on yourself. I know I know we used to be those people that swore we would never need one, but I assure you, we don't have one and WE NEED ONE.

       

Pictured: Borrowed SUV